The 2nd time is better.

W E D N E S D A Y 28 oct |  
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We are back into something from our past that now needs us to make a decision or to see this from another side that we weren’t giving enough attention. When you think about a vacation to a place you’ve been, you have lots of curiosities about how you need to be prepared and what it will actually feel like. But on your 2nd time of going you will have this whole data base PLUS even more that you want to explore because you have this relatively sound feeling of comfort, like you are coming home to a place or experience you know. 
 
So we need one time to do it from an unknown consciousness, and then a known, and then each time opens you to being more aware and in the moment – and ultimately, just because you NOW have the KNOWING. 
 
And you can read about the knowing, like you did before your first trip, but it was not even close to the actual knowing when you have finally walked it. Before having a baby is one story, after having a baby is another. Get that through our mind today as you are being asked to walk gracefully in not thinking you are deficient, or something is wrong with you because you don’t have all the knowing that settles you in this moment. But see how each time we do go to that same vacation spot or go on another date or get through a rough cave period or depression or whatever we do, when we get through it we always feel better – and we try to explain to others what it will be like rounding the corner from one space to another, but we never ever know until we really walk it. 
 
The differences between the last year of high schoolers, like YOU ALL ARE, and the 3rd graders, who are the mainstream and majority of humans, IS a life yet to be walked – and experienced – and touched into – and fallen into – and heartbroken from – and risk taking scary – and challenge overcome – and leap of faith into the best thing ever. ALL OF THEM NEED TO BE LIVED. 
 
This week your system is going through something that looks like video film in a machine that goes backwards fast and stops at a place where you are to do this better and where THIS TIME you are allowing the experience TO JUST BE. We don’t need to fight this life, even if it is scary AF and where too many things are happening one after the other. We need you in least resistance so that your video film can STOP and start over in this new way where you aren’t so automatic and falling into loser town with any little provocation or challenge. 
 
It can be scary to hold hope and belief in yourself – but you can. You are doing PERFECT at this time and there is nothing wrong with the choices that led you to here. So, allow your body, with some deep breathes taken right now to just settle into seeing that big things are coming, and you just need to ride the magic carpet and let it go and surrender for a few days. You are being too hard on yourself because you were programmed to be. 
 
But THE MOMENT you let up, support is going to fly your way and show you that you are a safe little ducky who is NOT all alone and having to fend for yourself. Support IS around you and it comes when you let it go, stop trying to control yourself or the bad behaviored people around you. Let them do their thing and you just focus your mind on seeing the beauty of your life as you trust that the other sides are coming, the answers are coming, the community is coming, the love YOU NEED is building in all of us where we all will be noticing each other much brighter. And where our eyes will identify beauty in a new way. 
 
But first, let’s unwind the story you were watching. Let’s pull the film back to where things got off track, and get you surrendering this time and allowing the story TO DRIVE YOU to where you need to be. Do something in a new way where it is about surrendering to the signs and not forcing yourself in there when things are not ready for you. You don’t have to jump any guns; you just need to sit back and take in the sights and wait for when the path is cleared, and something ignites you with full on passion to go out and kick some ass. But first, let’s unwind and find out where your reach was ill-timed and thus confidence deflating. When ON TIME your confidence will be there, and often it takes a 2nd time to get it right. 
 
 
Time to unwind the old story
And rewrite your position 
On uncomfortable situations
So that you learn to trust this experience
As providing essential wisdom
For you to fully experiment with 
On your unique journey. 
Without the knowing you come up empty. 
And you, my love, deserve something FULL OF LIFE.