Ask for help and a miracle.

​T U E S D A Y 19 jan |  
 
OKAY THEN! Be aware that people are LIT today. And it may be that they are lit up in love and stoked to get on with it with this certain area of their life that has been blocked for some time, and loud in the mind of wonderment. So, freeing this backed up pipe is going to feel liberating and where those who are there are completely transformed in how their eyes NOW work. 
 
This means they are seeing the sunshine and the rainbows and the light that is in the dark, because there is no reason to fight what is your life. In some way and for some higher calling, you need to live this right here. You need to walk through the on-the-edge feelings SO THAT you are forced to surrender and let it go and pray to higher powers that support arrives. 
 
I was going through NOT having a car for months now, but really since Christmas Eve. My car had a recall on it that would make it unable to start at random times, but then leading up to not starting at all. I, growing up with a stepfather who was a mechanic, and forced me under the hood for all repairs, chose to try to diagnose it instead of racing to the dealership to let them save me straight away. 
 
Instead, I spent months destabilizing my life AND wondering profusely about what this could be. It ended up being the break light switch that goes inoperative when in contact with cleaning supplies. So those who keep the car clean get stopped down the road at some 100% unknown time. 2 million cars were playing that Russian roulette. Is it today; is it next year? I got next year, but. 
 
Anyway. I WASTED SO MUCH LIFE FROM BEING SO SELF RELIANT FROM MY CHILDHOOD THAT I DIDN’T EVEN THINK TO ASK FOR HELP. I was afraid they would say no on something or give me bad news – BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT I MOSTLY SAW WHEN I SPOKE ABOUT MY NEEDS. 
 
So, I stayed private with my problem, wondering all the horrible google potential causes. And, I only figured it out because someone in my private space talked about a recall with her vehicle, unrelated, but RECALL made me get to google to see. And there were the words talking about what can happen, which was happening to me for months!!
 
But my point. Getting my car to the dealership meant I needed to get it towed 2 hours away, UNLESS it would miraculously start on the morning of my 9am appointment. And then I could drive it down in peace, where they had a brand-new Crosstrek for me to drive for the day. 
 
And the night before, when I had not heard back from the tow company where I put out an order for a future tow through my towing protection. So, I didn’t even know if they would come. And the night before I had NO answers still. 
 
But I was like, I’m just going to pray and ask for a miracle where the car miraculously starts and makes this process easy on me. I decided to NOT see all the worst case scenarios and to just finally let it go and dream my wildest dreams taking care of me and making it all no big dealio. 
 
What happened is the tow driver DID come, and only got the request an hour before arriving, not when I sent it out over the days before, AND the car ended up starting for him to easily load on the trailer! THE CAR STARTED after days and 12 attempts. I thought it had finally done the last die. And even though it got hauled for me – and I got the best ride with the most rad 25 year old person ever, the car started. It was a miracle -- and all I could do was surrender and hope for the best. Then the best happened!
 
But now that clog is fixed! I also had a bad tire that needed repair and they took care of that too! Didn’t even want me to put gas in the loaner car! They were like, go have fun! So I drove back home and stayed at home until later in the day when I drove back down and picked up my car. Even as I drove towing the car, we were going along the river and AN EAGLE was right there at eyes height getting ready to go down into the water and catch a fish. But it was like RIGHT THERE and never in my life have I been sure I was really seeing an Eagle. This was feet away and 100% an Eagle!
 
But back to my point. I made my situation worse by not asking for help, and trying to do it all on my own. BUT -- WHEN I DID ask for help, things turned into magic where I was swooped up and HIGHLY taken care of.
 
I made something WORSE OF THIS because of my wounds. I didn’t have to suffer like this. I could have had it fixed back in July when it first happened. And it got me losing the trust of my car, where I suddenly could be stranded, and it would take a few minutes to get the car started. I didn’t have to walk that. BUT I DID. And I complicated my life further from that inaction/action.
 
BUT, cleaning things up forward, I got the most blessed outcome from it. We all walk like this. We can get there quicker, if we got things right the first time, BUT no matter what, we get rewarded when we do good things. VALUING YOU and your time IS a good thing. Making YOU important is a good thing. Asking for help IS a good thing. 
 
 
We get rewarded when we do good things. 
VALUING YOU and your time IS a good thing. 
Making YOU important is a good thing. 
Asking for help IS a good thing.